Normal people have perfectly normal reactions to receiving gifts.
I, on the other hand, am not normal and am therefore terrible at receiving gifts. Case in point: The Eye Pin.
If you haven’t noticed the extraordinary eye pin I am wearing in the photos, take a closer look, I’ll wait.
This glorious lil bauble was made by Céleste Mogador who you should follow on Instagram because she is an embroidery wizard. It’s part of her “Je t’ai à l’oeil” series, which translates to “I’ve got my eye on you.” And Miss Mogador quite literally has her eye pinned on me.
My sister was strolling through the left bank of Paris and saw the illustrious pin in the window of an interiors boutique and thought of me. I know, it’s friggin romantic as hell. Just looking at it, you can see that Alicia knows me. And not in the way that you know your friend doesn’t drink tequila because they threw up that one time. We’re womb buddies, she KNOWS.
In her mind, Alicia thought she had found the perfect gift. It harkens to art history, surrealism, and my favorite artist, Salvador Dalí’s L’ull del temps (1949, The Eye of Time). Fun fact: Did you know that eyes are also one of the most important symbolic sensory organs? They are associated with clairvoyance, omniscience, intelligence, imagination, light, vigilance, moral conscience, and truth to name a few.
You might even say Alicia has an eye for these kinds of things. (See what I did there?) But if we’re honest here, I would say she knows me better than I know myself, but in this case that did not play out.
She bought the pin and immediately told me that she got me this incredible gift, and how excited she was to give it to me when she returned to New York. BUT (of course there’s a but) she wouldn’t tell me what it was and left me in terrible suspense. Thanks to a lot of Mr. Rogers in my formative years, my imagination ran wild. Naturally, I assumed she robbed The Louvre for me because I’m worth it. Why not. Unfortunately, when she gave me the pin the “garden of my mind” and Mr. Rogers were MIA. Apparently, this is what I said (as reenacted by Alicia):
“Umm, I mean how much did you spend on it? I mean it’s a pin, and I don’t really wear pins. Like, how would I even wear this? You clearly bought this for yourself and were not thinking of me at all.”
But I didn’t stop there, OH NO, NO, NO. It suddenly clicked how truly awful I was behaving …and I started to cry.
So imagine, here’s poor Alicia, who not only bought me this exquisite pin, suffers my abuse and temporary insanity, but THEN has to comfort me. I am a monster. A thankless monster.
More importantly, to even question “how would I wear this?” is literal insanity. I CANNOT understand what uncreative cretin had invaded my soul.
Yes, she is a trendsetter, and yes, I was an a$$hole.
Ultimately, I have grown, I have learned, AND I have figured out how to wear this pin. Unfortunately, the jury is still out on my gift receiving abilities. Until further notice, please send all gifts to the same vacation destination my manners frequent. Thank you.
GET THE LOOK:
Céleste Mogador Pin, similar options here.
Vintage Tommy Hilfiger Shirt, similar option here. *Note: Size up for similar effect
Prada Slides, similar option here.
Pomellato Sunglasses, similar option here.